On a side note I was about to claim how racially tolerant I am because I bought the black version of the game, but then I looked down and saw the box in front of me clearly stating the WHITE version, with a big black monster on it that I'm assuming I'm meant to catch. Ugh, even when I try not to be racist!.. Anyways it doesn't mean anything right? I blame Nintendo for coming up with such a dividing name for the franchise, they may as well have called it Pokémon Nicole Kidman/Barack Obama versions. Those CRAZY Japanese people (whom I secretly love) they come up with all kinds of inappropriate things....
"Anyone Remember this?"
Was that racist of me? Anyways, of course the moment I popped the game into the DS and 5 Pokémon later it was about 12.30 AM (I started at about 5.30PM), if you ever wanted to get old really fast, this game is the way to go! It's like a really crappy time machine that only goes forward for you. I have to say though, they actually did make an effort to improve everything this time around with much improved graphics (the Pokémon actually MOVE this time OMG), the battle system is smoother this time around and, as per usual, they've crammed it full of new moves and Pokémon to make it as addictive as ever.
What I WAS fairly surprised to see was the what the games' storyline was about, which basically revolves around the ethics of the premise. The premise, if you didn't know, is about going on a journey catching every fucking thing that tries to get in YOUR way and if not you must beat the UNHOLY shit out of them. It's fairly ridiculous as characters in the game hark on about how Pokémon and Humans live in harmony even though humans enslave them and make them battle until they pass out or enter them into ridiculous beauty pageants (seriously, I just came across a pageant and made my horse thing wear sunglasses and a top hat, which made him look FAB btw!), all for their own personal entertainment. BUT the storyline is about a group stealing other peoples Pokémon so they can free them to live their own lives, sounds like a good lesson for children right? Kudos to the developers for making a storyline with realistic values.... except it's up to YOU to make sure that doesn't happen! Ha I guess I do always like to play the villain...
"JAAAAAAA!! I CAUGHT A VILD PICKACHU!"
So yeah that was kinda neat to me that they acknowledged the moral ethics (if not exactly the way it should be done). What wasn't so neat to me was the new Pokémon. In previous versions of the game you would come across the old mixed with the new with familiarity at your side. However in this newest version it's almost entirely brand new Pokémon from the get go, in fact I don't think I've seen any originals yet. This wouldn't a problem except for how god damn fucking UGLY they all are! I mean, you're encouraged to catch them all but in all honesty I didn't want most of them only except that I had to take them in if I wanted to progress. One of them is a bin bag with eyes, then there's one that's literally a pigeon, but called Pidove instead. If I wanted a god damn pigeon I'd take a stroll down to the Spanish Arch, with a bin bag handy (maybe with eyes stuck on it), and throw it over the pigeon. Seán has caught a pigeon! Bin Bag gains 50 Whoopdey-Fucking-Doo-Points! My main starting Pokémon looks like an ultra retarded pig at the moment (I don't want to see what it will become next) and there's a stupid little yorkshire terrier looking one that would have my foot coming out of its mouth because I'd kick it so hard in the ass if it were real.
"FUCKINGUGLYRETARDFACE, I choose you!!!"
I haven't gotten too far into it but so far there are very few that impress me so fingers crossed that I will want to enslave more Pokémon to do my bidding. At least the music is cheery! So far though I've clocked probably near 20 hours into it so I guess it's doing something right and I've barely scratched the surface of it yet. AND apparently there's a whole online section I have yet to delve into yet, so I can't, like TOTALLY WAIT to do beauty pageants with you guys!
Anyways, since I haven't gotten very far into it at all I can't speak much more on this topic.Who would've thought my first proper post back in a while would be about Pokémon eh?
Until next time... Toodles!
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