Paddy's Hilarious Joke

Now before I start explaining this "joke" my housemate Paddy played on me two nights ago I unfortunately have to explain the context of the situation that it was in.

To put it bluntly, Paddy and  I went out on Friday night, got trollied drunk and came home to our apartment turned upside down because it was robbed while we were gone.

I won't delve into the details of that part of the story but under the circumstances of the night we were all positively stressed and gob smacked that this had happened since alot of our valuables amongst a present or two were all gone.

Anyways, I'm not telling this story for a pity vote because, without trying to make myself sound noble or whatever (and I most certainly am not), pity isn't something I'm looking for.

Now, to return to the story. We were hammered, upset, the guards called round and all that and we sorted what we could for that moment in time. It must've been about 5 or 6 AM before we finally settled down a bit and just tried to enjoy ourselves again with the drink we had left in the house.

My friend Paddy has a few crazy drunk stories behind him (but all good crazy, as in funny), but whatever crazy notion brought him to this idea of a joke is beyond me but I have to hand it to him, he pulled it off very convincingly.

As we sat there just talking in general about what had happened I decided I needed a much needed toilet break. So off I went to climb the stairs with barely an ounce of energy left in me from the night. I did my business and returned to the TV room downstairs.

I walked in and I turned to Paddy to ask him something and realised something was slightly amiss about his stature. He sat with a blank stare, not breathing, eyes wide open. He seemed devoid of all life.

 

"Paddy, something is amiss about you!"

I naturally straight away started laughing and saying "Paddy, stop now!" and shook him once or twice. No response. I still didn't believe him so I kept laughing passively and shook Paddy again saying "Paddy Come on". He still didn't move, he was just... nothing.

At this point I began to think Paddy wasn't capable holding a joke this long (yes Paddy, I think that little of your humor!) so I began to worry a bit. I stood there repeatedly going "Paddy, Paddy, Paddy" with increasing stress rising behind my tone. He just wouldn't respond, so I slapped him across the face. Now, I thought if Paddy was joking, there was no way he would hold himself after that. It wasn't a wallop by any means, but it certainly wasn't a light slap either. Still no response.

 

"Paddy, Wake up!"

I now began falling into the stages of freaking out. First our house got robbed and now my housemate seemingly died from a heart attack. I actually began to panic. Paddy luckily finally took pity on my tortured mind and began laughing. BEGAN LAUGHING. I was on my knee's in shock and he decided it was a good time to end his farce.

All I did was burst out laughing too partly from relief that he was actually ALIVE, and partly because he put the situation into the context of "it could be worse".

Regardless of how cruel or crazy the joke/prank was, or how the notion of how it even popped into Paddy's head, we have laughed several times at it afterwards and I'm still laughing at it right now, even though my first initial thought was to kill him.

Anyways, in the end, at least we're all alive, everything else is just material and the event didn't ruin Christmas by any means.

Happy Christmas everyone!

The Power of Aquarius!

Check out mah new video I made the other day.

During one of my very boring excursions to facebook I was sitting thinking of what video I could make next, considering I hadn't made one in some time. I was thirsty as I thought this and then Eureka, I decided to make one about getting a glass over water, probably in the most awkward and ridiculous of ways!

Upon viewing the final edit, it appears to be the most random video I've made to date which leads me to believe it will just confuse more than create laughs, but enjoy it for what it's worth!

Caught in the Dark

    Right so we're off to another one of my video spree's, this one being the newest one I made a week or two ago, finally got my internet back so it's uploaded. It's a little horror short we made called "Caught in the Dark" about a man caught in his apartment as an unseen force waits outside to get in. I hope ye enjoy! It required a whole night of editing :P

A Kiss To Be Remembered

    During the hustle bustle of Galway night life, a few friends and I decided to go for a drink at our local, Neacthain's pub. We all sat and drank our pints to merry content as we told the stories of our rather monotonous lives thinking they were hilarious to our fake laughter. Half way through this conversation my friend Damian offered me a cigarette in joining him for a smoke, I obliged.

    So off we went outside and smoked watching people rush us by eagerly to get to the pub boxes for drinks and what not and as we watched we noticed one of the city's socially dysfunctional people walking by across the road. Now don't get me wrong, I feel sorry for this guy because he's the more severe of the mentally ill people wandering the streets of Galway, but from one of my previous excursions outside Neachtain's I saw him hit a woman across the back of the head because she did not have a lighter to give.

"He actually kinda looks like House, but even more angry. And even more psychotic."

    So naturally I was afraid of his presence because he constantly shouts loudly and violently at passerbys in threatening tones. The trick with him is to avoid eye contact. Much to my dismay I had accidently made eye contact with him at this very moment in time. I quickly turned my head nearly giving myself whiplash and looked at Damian saying "Oh God he just saw me looking at him" to which Damian kindly replied "Yes Seán, he's coming over now". Afraid to turn around I just ignored the unfolding event hoping the man would veer as violently as he talks to people to the left or right. Neither happened.

    I turned around to be greeted to his face practically in mine. He held his hand out waggling his fingers like a piano player with arthritis. I was afraid so I shook his hand hoping he would leave. He shouted in my face with a positive comment, not a bad one, to which I didn't fully understand and then asked for a cigarette. I calmly replied while shaking nervously "I'm sorry bud, this is my last one" to which he brushed me off (with an exhale of relief on my behalf) and turned to Damian. "I'm sorry bud, I got this off a friend inside" said the Damian. And then the man got angry. So Damian, out of the well being of not getting smacked in the face offered the man the rest of his cigarette.

    A hilarious hen party broke out inside of my nerves as I thought this was the end of the situation. But no, much to my dismay the man leaned over and gave me a hug with his arm, resembling more of a headlock than anything, and kissed me on the neck whispering "Thank you". I presume he was trying to thank Damian whom quickly went inside straight after this. I WAS following suite until the man stopped me wriggling his fingers at me yet again. Scared and confused I went to shake his hand again, was this the beginning of a new relationship? No. He was not pleased I tried to shake his hand, instead he violently shuddered towards the cigarette still in my hand. Naturally I obliged and he took it now holding two cigarettes, one in each hand. I then made somewhat of a a dash to the door which was only a meter away at this point when he grabbed me yet again and nudged me in the ribs and screamed in my face,

"Don't die".

"My Reaction"

I didn't. But the look on his face almost led me to believe that I was about to. I made it back inside to warmth and safety a millisecond later. The lads laughed, I nearly cried and we all pretty much went home.

And that, my friends, is the most action I've had in a while. And it's a kiss I will remember for days, weeks, hell even YEARS to come.

Until next time, BYEILOVEYOU!

Gazing Upon People and Past

So after a mad summer of parties, weddings and going-away-wakes for my friends  Becky and Dee (who deserve a post on their own for some of the stories I have about those asylum fugitives), I've managed to get evicted from one apartment 3 times (the third being the charm) and winding up living in my friends' old apartment bang in the middle of Galway City, but here, I practically lived there anyways so it was only destiny that I land up here. The Summer past was eventful to say the least.

Now I sit on my perch stealing internet from a free hotspot café with my laptop (which is practically rubble, becoming merely a mess of wires,  a TFT monitor and keyboard) where it sits nestled in the corner of the room at the window because it's the only place I can pick up internet. This however is working out wonderfully as I have become the ultimate voyeur, peering out as people walk by unsuspectingly to my gaze. It may be creepy but it's a hella lot of entertainment, lets just hope no one looks up or my face may meet the window sill in an attempt to hide which would prove more noticeable as my face explodes against the window by the sheer force of my ducking powers for the now suspecting viewer. I guess you could say I couldn't be happier at the moment.

"I''m watching you"

But here here, I have decided that I've now finally built up a requiem of stories to tell that I will post over the next few weeks for anyone who cares to enjoy, I can assure you one or two may catch your interest, but for now I'll only go with what I can think of because it will take time to piece together some of the nights of madness that are both memorable and unmemorable at the same time.

My plans this year are to quit smoking again, make silly shorts to more serious shorts (that may inadvertently turn out to be silly), find an unsuspecting boyfriend who can buy me custard cream biscuits and make me tea at a whim's notice and possibly become a celebrity. These are all unlikely things, especially some one who will buy me biscuits and make me tea. And the celebrity part. And the short films part. And the smoking part. Hmm this is almost like my new years resolutions again.

Realistically I've just realised I don't know where I'm going with this post so I will start with the more disturbing story that actually got me evicted from my last apartment. I call it "Don't Shit on your own Doorstep", you'll understand soon enough.

Amongst the fair warnings of parties and so called anti social behaviour warnings from our landlords (to which I disagree, parties are incredibly social if they stopped and thought about it) there was one particular incident that seemingly went in favour of our eviction. The worst part was, it wasn't even our fault but it was obvious we would be blamed.

Upon returning to my apartment block with a few friends after clubbing, we entered the downstairs lobby area of my block to get the elevator to the third floor where my apartment was. However, before we could even make it to the lift we were hit with what can only be described as a gigantic fart (which wasn't far off the truth). What was this fart you say? Why, it was none other than literal shit all over the lobby floor. Let me elaborate.

Apparently while we were out boogying down like the groovey cats we are, some poor girl back in Kirwan's Court who may have had a little too much to drink managed to wander from a party in the block down to the front door of the lobby. But this simple task proved exceedingly difficult to our female friend and the overwhelming sense of her victory travel to the door made her puke all over herself and pass out. But that wasn't all. I'm assuming that when she came to again that she got so excited about the prospects beyond the door that she couldn't contain herself any longer.

And SHIT eeeeeeeeverywhere.

"I just shit on your doorstep!"

And when I say everywhere I mean it, my theory is she tried to walk again which was unfortunately brought her into this mess in the first place, while proceeding to unload into our lobby area. In the end the paramedics had to pick up our poohey friend and leave. But they did us a small favour, they left news papers on the biggest poohs so we didn't have to see all of them, like she was a DOG!

Anyways, much to our disgust we went upstairs and slept or whatever. The next day a caretaker told us that everyone though she came from our house and a few hours later we had an eviction notice in the form of our landlord standing at the door. What a shitty situation har har har! We naturally explained that we don't get that... SHIT faced, when out and about and that we are also aware of where the toilets are if we do need to use them but alas, it was all in vane, that was the final nail in my eviction from number 23 Kirwan's Court. And while we didn't shit on our own doorstep, someone else happily did it for us.

So that was the story of how I wound up perched here, gazing sexily out the window with come-hither-to eyes contemplating the next step in my exceedingly unpredictable life (when I say that I mean bad luck), which is in part why I came back to this.

For now, I bid you adieu, until next time I say, don't shit yourselves, it's not cleanly and it may get people evicted from their apartments!

Toodles!

Making Moosic

    Well this is another lazy attempt of a post since I never appear to come onto this anymore unless I've made a new video, never the less, it is a post. After a brief unfortunate even of Camera being stolen/Camera being recovered, I decided out of sheer happiness that I would make a new video. This ended up being me hitting things in my room and trying to assort it into a random rhythm. The result is nothing special but I'm happy that I got a little more creative than usual with this one, so I hope ye can enjoy it for what it's worth!

Woe, Is Rhonda

Well it looks like this will be the last of my Rhonda videos for a while, I think the balance I was trying to keep between weird and funny his finally just tipped right into weird and silly. But for what it is (which isn't much with any of these videos to be honest :P ) I hope we can enjoy Rhonda's mini send off for the next few months or year!

Gettin' Groovey With Plastic!

   Well another evening of boring endeavours has produced yet another shorter but slightly funkier short than the ones I have made before, I give you Rhonda's big debut music video, short and sweet like my little mannequin friend!

Kicking Open the Closet Door

    Well after a fairly mad year in Galway after finishing college I have to say I've had a great time and a few changes became apparent in my life. Mind you they were only few and what I thought would make things radically different in my life only made everything become more normal to me. For those of you who now me that haven't heard (although I'm pretty sure most people do know by now at this stage) I came out over the year since last Summer as Gay or Homosexual if you will. I don't know how many of you will read this but I'd like to just use this as a platform for anyone who missed the news (not that it's a big deal really) to get to the rest of anyone who hasn't heard my "big news" as quoted by my mother. Apologies also to those who didn't know until now, announcing things like this in person becomes exhausting sometimes and since everyone I've been around lately seems to know I just flew with the "everyone knows" attitude. Also, I think anyone who finds out off this will have been more privileged than most of my family was when last Summer I drunkenly texted them at 4.30 in the morning via webtext online saying I was gay to them. It was an interesting wake up text for them!

"Seán O'Beirn has come out, and now the boys are lining up!"

    So anyways, if any of you were wondering how long I was "hiding" this for I can give you a little backstory on it I suppose. I started to realise that I was gay between the age of 16-18 but I never admitted it to myself, it was all confustering and a little new to me. Just a little. There wasn't really much to this time period it was just something about myself I was suppressing or hiding because I found it embarrassing initially. We all deal with things our own way and I was dealing with this my way, which was basically ignoring what is instinct to me. I won't lie, it was stressful and and I used to pretend to myself thinking I could change, but it was never overwhelming at the same time so I never expected or wanted to garner pity for myself. When I was off to college however the new world of Galway became opportunity as I made a tonne of new friends and realised after meeting new people that I could ease up on my sexuality and become more acceptant of myself, it was the only way to go really. Also through the power of interweb and gay chat/dating sites I also made a few friends over the internet that were established around Galway, so that became a sort of doorway into the Gay community for me.

   After the first year of college I came to admit to myself that I was gay, the biggest hurdle of them all in my opinion and after that things took a while but were certainly much easier. I made a good few gay friends over the college years and even secretly went on a date or two (oh my!) and also came out (drunkenly) to two of my college friends, but it was around the Summer of last year when I started hanging around a group of lads and girls who are gay that I really became at ease with my sexuality.

   I began going to the scene on nights out towards the end of my final college year with this group and then once summer hit and the fact that I was living in Galway for it, I was going out with them constantly. It was all new to me yet refreshing that I was able to relax and relate to them about the same things that I was never able to do with my straight friends (I mean that in no bad way of course) and the more at ease I became the less I cared about what other people thought. I decided it was time to tell more people, my sister being the first because I lived with her at the time. I did this drunkenly as well, I have a thing for saying things when I'm drunk it seems. I suppose it was a cowardly way of doing it but in the end I said it which is still a big deal in the end. As it turns out now, I've never been happier with the results.

"Aine..... I think I'm Gay"

    Then as I mentioned at the beginning I told my family and as the summer progressed it turned out my class in college knew and then I told some friends from home and yada yada. etc., it just all snowballed out of control and eventually turned into an avalanche so many people knew come the start of 2011. I was shocked at how little people cared, not that I expected them to being like "wtf!?" but more because no one even really asked me about it. Then I came to realise that being gay is just a part of my life and not what defines me which led me to think "why was I giving a shit all this time?". The Summer ended up being an absolutely mad binge of a first step but a great laugh in the end and it has become a very important stepping stone in my life.

   When I did the Galway Pride and Limerick Pride they were both great experiences and all the time I was learning about how illy perceived the community was (for the most part) and, really, just how normal it was to be gay. Nothing was different. People would ask "Oh, what's it like to be gay?" and I just would say "What's it like being straight?". I find it funny because when you make people think like that, the difference ends up being very little. Sure we like the same sex, but the feelings are still all the same. A guy likes a guy the same way a guy likes a girl, or a girl likes a guy the same way a girl likes a girl, you can look at it from any gender but it doesn't matter, it's all the same feelings in the end which is the important part. It just so happens to be that I like guys myself instead of girls, that's all. Anyways I could end up going on and on about this stance I have on homosexuality but really I just wanted to let ye know how I came to embrace being gay and not caring that I was, so I'll leave this discussion at that!

    Anyways, I have happily been out to many for a while and I had a great year (the year being a college year) and I won't bother going into the details of it but I've never been more comfortable with myself in my life. I wrote this mainly because I thought people who don't know deserve to know and those who wanted to know more now know...well, more! Although at the same time I have yet  to see if anyone will even read this :P. I thank all of those who are cool with it and supportive, it's been great (Sorry I won't go into specific people, there's too many to thank for different reasons, but everyone knows how important they are in the end!) and for those of you who read this it is muchos appreciated that you took the time to.

There's not much else to here really, but I guess I could also use this as an opportunity to explain the unruly campiness of THIS:

My biggest regret is that I didn't tell people sooner.

Till next time, toodles!

My Friend Rhonda

    As long as I've had this blog for I've always struggled after the initial first 15 posts to come up with something worth talking about. Mind you, it's not like everything else I've posted was worthwhile.... But I can't believe I've gone on as long as I have without talking about my friend Rhonda, whom I met 3 years ago and boy oh boy, have we hit off since.

     But first, let's do a little backtracking on Rhonda's life. Born in a factory and full time worker in a Wedding Dress shop until 3 years ago, Rhonda had a tumultuous life of ravaging beauty and past work factory hardships. But alas after a wonderful yet gruelling 12 years, Rhonda got her big break when she first met the O'Beirn's. Realising she needed to be loved and cared for (and dressing her in absoFAB outfits!) we took her under our featherless wings and taught her how to have a really good time. Yes, Rhonda learned how to enjoy life to the fullest.

Say Hello to Rhonda

   As evident from the picture above, Rhonda is a striking beauty who is capable of wearing many different styles as well as mixing them, like a wedding dress, a winter cap and a neck brace. She's some woman for one woman.

    We had trouble with Rhonda when we first brought her into our home. She was incredibly shy and used to always hide in the bathroom under the stairs. Even worse, she could never decide what to wear so most of the time she just moved around the house in the nip, always alarming guests... and foes. But as the summer progressed, Rhonda WARMED UP to the idea of wearing a wonderful flourel/Hawaiian themed outfit making the bathroom visits much more pleasant and cheerful for all involved. Rhonda became a instant hit with everyone who came into contact with her and while she never talked she would always listen to your problems and crisis's, her half smile and distant-yet-thought-provoking look always letting you know that hope was around the corner. She truly became an inspiration and beacon for all.

    As the Summer came to an end, Rhonda and I had formed an unprecedented bond unexpected to either of us. But fate would try and split us apart as I had to return to college and she stay in Castlebar to mind my family. Or so I thought.... not too long after moving into my new house in The Village, I awoke to find Rhonda had returned to me, she must've hitch hiked all the way to Galway just to find me. It was good to have her back.

It was good to have her back.

    Rhonda hung and partied with us till the moon sank low and the sun rose high. She touched as many people in Galway as she did at home (even after the tragic loses of her hands). She starred in films and wore many new cool and unique outfits to match how she felt about the seasons while also stealing a few of my own clothes. Yes Rhonda came back with a vengeance, a vengeance we were all pleased to be part of.

    As parties and time passed it was not long until my third and final year in college was beginning and Rhonda    and I moved on into a new house in Moneenageisha Court. Little did either of us know, tragedy was just around the corner...

   The final year of college became difficult as work piled on and juggling it with a part time job gave me less time to spend with Rhonda and friends. This took a toll on our relationship as Rhonda began to party more and become less and less caring about the damage she was causing around us. I began to argue with her and she responded by giving me the silent treatment, clearly thinking she was in the right and I the wrong. But the true tragedy stuck one fateful night. For once, everyone was enjoying themselves at a get together, drinks were had, dances were attempted and photos were captured all retelling a wonderful tapestry of the night. The next day became a stark contrast to the pleasant evening. In the cold grey hours of morning I arose to stumble for a glass of water for my parched body. I went downstairs to the kitchen pouring the glass but instantly feeling something wasn't right, something was missing, something big and irreplaceable.

Rhonda was gone.

   In a panic I woke my housemates asking had they seen where she had left to. They all became as distraught as I did as we interviewed and questioned everyone at the party from the night before. Time passed and the that "hope around the corner" attitude Rhonda always conveyed began to fade. All I wanted now was a Rhonda around the corner. Months passed and no sign or word appeared. Until one day in college on the notice board a foreboding sign appeared. Rhonda was being held at an undisclosed location and RANSOM was written under a picture of a black figureen holding a knife to her neck. Tape was over her poor little mouth so she couldn't scream for help. Everyone became up in arms as a new search began. Noone trusted anybody, it was clear that while Rhonda formed bonds over time she could also break them, unintentionally of course.

    Everything became intense. But things nearly imploded when a new ransom appeared at Christmas time; a boot to Rhonda's head with the title underneath stating "will she be home for christmas?". It was truely harrowing and upsetting for all who saw. I became feverish, saying to everyone that if ANY sign appeared of her whereabouts, just let me know. I was truly distraught, even going as far as trying to match Rhonda's fashion endeavours:

I could never pull this off, but Rhonda could

   But my prayers became answered! After a mysterious evening time ring of the doorbell I raced to the door, answering it to no one. I looked left and right, no sign of what caused the doorbell to ring. Then, I looked down. Rhonda lay on the doorstep, wearing a bin bag and a sign around her neck saying "Benn Drinkin'". "RHONDA!!" I screamed happily as my housemates came racing to see the heap of joy on the doorstep! "YOU'RE BACK!!". We brought her inside and let her stand in the warmth of our love as we wondered what she had been through. But Rhonda already had that explanation covered, on her back was a letter informing us of the events that had unfolded after her alleged kidnapping. For the first time ever it has been put up for all to see:

She proceeded to tell me the truth of her failings and apologised for the last time again. We forgave her, it was an emotional moment. As for the time between then and now, Rhonda has been doing what she always does best, listening to peoples problems in dark corners of random rooms in houses.... and partying out really hard!

Since then, Rhonda has also gone on to star in two important film roles, I give you them now:

And...

P.S. For those of you who don't believe, this IS all actually a true story, possibly a bit dramatised! :P

Like, TOAST!

     Well my friends, here is another result of the hardworking efforts of my filmmaking degree! Special thanks to Niall Patrick Walsh for acting and Colin Watts for being on camera letting me use his FAB apartment! Enjoy our swirling delusion world of idiocricy!

Youtube and Babybullet makes a potent mix for Comedy

    During one of my usual trips across all walks of the internet I happened upon one of the more bizarre videos I've seen in the recent past. This one is both weird, creepy and hilarious all at once. I reckon the infomercial was hilarious anyways if only for the alcoholic grandmother and the, like, totally retarded girl who likes the cups with "OMG faces!" on them, but slow it down and slap on some creepy music and you've reached levels close to comedy gold immediately. Well done to Wolfgore show for this one, it had me LOLing several times!

Who's That Pokémon!?

    So during one of my hungover states last weekend I once again cracked out my card and made an impulse purchase to make my hangover seem little, in comparison to the MIGHTY AWESOMEness I had just bought. Pokémon White/Black, which brings the total count of our little pocket monsters to 646!

    On a side note I was about to claim how racially tolerant I am because I bought the black version of the game, but then I looked down and saw the box in front of me clearly stating the WHITE version, with a big black monster on it that I'm assuming I'm meant to catch. Ugh, even when I try not to be racist!.. Anyways it doesn't mean anything right? I blame Nintendo for coming up with such a dividing name for the franchise, they may as well have called it Pokémon Nicole Kidman/Barack Obama versions. Those CRAZY Japanese people (whom I secretly love) they come up with all kinds of inappropriate things....

"Anyone Remember this?"

   Was that racist of me? Anyways, of course the moment I popped the game into the DS and 5 Pokémon later it was about 12.30 AM (I started at about 5.30PM), if you ever wanted to get old really fast, this game is the way to go! It's like a really crappy time machine that only goes forward for you. I have to say though, they actually did make an effort to improve everything this time around with much improved graphics (the Pokémon actually MOVE this time OMG), the battle system is smoother this time around and, as per usual, they've crammed it full of new moves and Pokémon to make it as addictive as ever.

    What I WAS fairly surprised to see was the what the games' storyline was about, which basically revolves around the ethics of the premise. The premise, if you didn't know, is about going on a journey catching every fucking thing that tries to get in YOUR way and if not you must beat the UNHOLY shit out of them. It's fairly ridiculous as characters in the game hark on about how Pokémon and Humans live in harmony even though humans enslave them and make them battle until they pass out or enter them into ridiculous beauty pageants (seriously, I just came across  a pageant and made my horse thing wear sunglasses and a top hat, which made him look FAB btw!), all for their own personal entertainment. BUT the storyline is about a group stealing other peoples Pokémon so they can free them to live their own lives, sounds like a good lesson for children right? Kudos to the developers for making a storyline with realistic values.... except it's up to YOU to make sure that doesn't happen! Ha I guess I do always like to play the villain...

"JAAAAAAA!! I CAUGHT A VILD PICKACHU!"

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    So yeah that was kinda neat to me that they acknowledged the moral ethics (if not exactly the way it should be done). What wasn't so neat to me was the new Pokémon. In previous versions of the game you would come across the old mixed with the new with familiarity at your side. However in this newest version it's almost entirely brand new Pokémon from the get go, in fact I don't think I've seen any originals yet. This wouldn't a problem except for how god damn fucking UGLY they all are! I mean, you're encouraged to catch them all but in all honesty I didn't want most of them only except that I had to take them in if I wanted to progress. One of them is a bin bag with eyes, then there's one that's literally a pigeon, but called Pidove instead. If I wanted a god damn pigeon I'd take a stroll down to the Spanish Arch, with a bin bag handy (maybe with eyes stuck on it), and throw it over the pigeon. Seán has caught a pigeon! Bin Bag gains 50 Whoopdey-Fucking-Doo-Points! My main starting Pokémon looks like an ultra retarded pig at the moment (I don't want to see what it will become next) and there's a stupid little yorkshire terrier looking one that would have my foot coming out of its mouth because I'd kick it so hard in the ass if it were real.

"FUCKINGUGLYRETARDFACE, I choose you!!!"

 
    I haven't gotten too far into it but so far there are very few that impress me so fingers crossed that I will want to enslave more Pokémon to do my bidding. At least the music is cheery! So far though I've clocked probably near 20 hours into it so I guess it's doing something right and I've barely scratched the surface of it yet. AND apparently there's a whole online section I have yet to delve into yet, so I can't, like TOTALLY WAIT to do beauty pageants with you guys!

Anyways, since I haven't gotten very far into it at all I can't speak much more on this topic.Who would've thought my first proper post back in a while would be about Pokémon eh?

Until next time... Toodles!

And Another One For Good Measure

After making a ridiculous video and titling it the end of my trilogy of tea related videos, last night I created a new film with a creepy and plain bizarrity that's has prevailed in my previous videos. Enjoy, it was a quick shot at some horror with a dab of comedy thrown in at the end!

Seán's Exciting Morning

After much debate with myself whether should actually make this AND post it up, I decided I will go through with it. In an attempt to make my mornings more interesting to myself (and everyone else in extension) I managed to create this thought provoking piece, ALL BY MYSELF!!! WOW! Enjoy!

My Uncontrollable Sexist Me

I was working on tils the other day at work (obviously). Now before I start I would just like to note that when I think of where I keep a radio in a house, it naturally falls into the kitchen area in my mind because people tend to eat and prepare food there and like that bit of background music or mood while doing these things....

Anyhoo, while at the tils a woman approached me. She gave me her catalogue number of the item she wished to order and I put it through. All was groovey. Before placing the final order down I always have to ask if this is the correct item just to be safe. In this case it was a radio, so I asked "It's a radio you want yes?" and she said "yes".

Now, in work we're also encouraged to make conversation with our customers to make them feel like an individual instead of just the "next" costumer. So I decided to apply this mindset to the current female customer in front of me.

I said "Oh so you're gonna have the radio in the kitchen yeah?", she looked at me with half a smirk and said "..no.. for work actually" and I thought aloud "oh, well that too!". Of course at this moment in time I was still completely unaware as to how sexist I must've sounded during this entire order. As she was walking away my snail paced mind clicked together, like to snails sliding into each other. I guess that's not really a click, more of a slow...slow slow slow thud.

Anyways, I turned to one of my co-workers at the til next to me and said "oh crap, I just realised how bad that sounded -" he was smirking at me and just said "yep!".

Oh what another shameful moment I handed to myself at work...

The Deathly Hallows Part 2

My Harry Potter film hype has gone into overload as of recently with the end of the film saga approaching quickly, yet still so far away at the same time!

I've always loved the openings of the films because they're always unique. The most recent two did a fantastic job with setting the tone of the films, which are progressively heading in darker territory every minute of their run time.

The Half Blood Prince had a fantastic opening in just the first 30 seconds where it briefly shows the after math of the battle with Voldemort in the ministry. It's effective with it's haunting score, Daniel Radcliffe's vacant expression after his traumatic ordeal and combined with the flashing of camera's riddled with Voldemort's intense battle cry, the whole sequence is quite unsettling and re rigs the franchise into the homestretch of dark things to come.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVHh_ldUF2U

The Deathly Hallows Part One had an equally unsettling and quite scary opening with the decaying Warner Brothers Logo floating out of the black clouds before fading to black. This is followed by a rising clockwork clicking (presumably of the locket), screeching and wilderness which becomes increasingly louder before cutting to the first scenes of the film. It's intense and signifies hostility the world has fallen into and how dark things have become. I find it remarkable that all of this is conveyed in just 30 seconds of screen time yet again.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGtms4B1pO8

And finally, to get to the point for which this post was made, a screen cap of the opening sequence of the final film has surfaced and it looks like we're yet again to impress with the most foreboding and violent title sequence yet. To put my thoughts into words, the wait for this movie is killing me inside. Feast your eyes:

A New Video

After labouring for a whole 2 separated hours in the evening and a few hours of editing, the fruits of hour crappy labour has finally paid off in a weird and wonderful way.... ENJOY!!

30 Day Music Challenge... IN ONE DAY!

I've been noticing on the ol' social networking website known as Facebook (you might've heard of it...) that many peoples are taking part in the 30 Day Music Challenge. Since that requires a certain amount of persistence (which I don't have) to put something new up every day, I have taken it on myself to list off 30 songs I've been addicted to as of late. They're in no particular order of preference, but I do like some more than others:

1)


I guess this is my favourite at the moment, it's total badassery


2)
>

My walk and strut song


3)


Long, melancholic, haunting and sad but really really cool!


4)


Another cool Puscifer song, they need to make MOAR!


5)


If you haven't heard, I have a Battlestar Galactica Obsession


6)


I think everyone owes it to themselves to listen to this, it's friggin' cool


7)


A hilariously weird song about a robot obsessed with cake and death


8)


Silent hill, industrial grungy coolness


9)


Moar silent hillness

10)


Daft Punk's awesome soundtrack to Tron Legacy


11)


A depressing but haunting melody.


12)


Super cool song from Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World


13)


I don't really know what to say about this one...


14)


One to blow your head off your shoulders


15)


Half way there!


16)


I would put this whole soundtrack down, but then there'd be no variety!


17)


Battlestar Galactica's loud, middle eastern cover of All Along the Watchtower


18)


A really nice piece... It makes me think of someone running away from something.... with no sound :P


19)


My favourite piece of music ever created. I want this played at my funeral!


20)


Cool beat and cool song by Korn


21)


Probably one of the most uplifting songs I've ever listened to


22)


Love this one!


23)


This be Fightin' music


24)


Intro song to Season 4 of The Wire, really really groovay


25)


From Mad Men, that ridiculously engaging song at the beginning of every episode!


26)


It just builds and builds onto itself to an explosive ending.


27)


I think we all know this one...


28)


Really strangely uplifting track from Sunshine.


29)


More haunting tracks... I'm all about the haunting today


30)


This one I hold closely to my heart!


And there you have it, 30 songs/tracks/whatever you want to call them from me. I generally listen to movie scores so I really tried this time to find songs with lyrics, forgive me if this doesn't match your pathetic taste!

Just Chugging Along

    At work yesterday I inadvertently made a hilariously bad pun that confused both me and the customer at the same time. As I brought out a Chuggington Book thingy to a man I did my my usual "Hi, how are you?" greeting. He of course responded "Great now, yourself?". It didn't click with me straight away that I had made a pun, I think it just happened because I was reading the title of the book as I came out to the shop floor. My response was "Oh you know, just chugging along through the day". As I signed off on the receipt I couldn't help but notice that the man was staring at me with a rather large smile. An intense smile if you will. A BURNING smile. This confused me and and the customer, because I didn't acknowledge it immediately. Then I realised I had made a horrible pun. I responded with "Oh my god, that was a bad pun I didn't even notice I made". He laughed and said "yeah, it was". And then left me to grimace at my own embarrassment.

Damn it, it happens just too often.

On a side note, I love bad puns. As Eoin Kelly once said to me about 127 hours "it rocks".

25 Years of Zelda

            I usually don't post unless I have a long boring story all of you don't need to read, but since it has come to my attention that it's the 25th anniversary of the greatest game franchise EVAR, I thought it deserved it's own post to commemorate it. And I also came across an absolutely amazing picture only a genius could have made to celebrate this fact, feast your eyes on this amazing feat of artistry.

Sleeping Beauty and her Morbid Kingdom

My body's general disdain for me left me in a restless slumber last night. So in a race to fall asleep with myself I decided the best option was to find a classic Disney film to help me conk. Much to my dismay, this did not work.

The movie in question was Sleeping Beauty, surely a film about a woman going for a lengthy (albiet death inducing) nap would help drag a curtain over these eyes. Alas, instead I became enveloped in the film as I questioned the motives of the characters and plot for the 1 hour 15 minute runtime. For example, Maleficent, she's the villain of the film but I think she takes things a little over the top from the get go. I mean, she throws a hissy fit about not being invited to the christening of Princess Aurora. If this makes her angry, clearly she cares to a certain extent about what people think of her. So what does she go ahead and do? She puts a death inducing curse on the 1 year old child that will kill her at the age of 16, by touching an evil green spindle wheel. This is over not being invited. To a christening.

There must be no Sky Plus in her castle.

"Damn it! I missed Independence Day... AGAIN!"

Second of all, the King and Queen both do not care about their daughter nor have any quality talents themselves. They let the fairies morph the child's face with the gift of beauty and then tack on a bit of X-factor to her with the gift of song. The only really meaningful thing the fairies give is that she doesn't die from bad ass bitch Maleficent's curse. THEN when all said and done, they just give their child away for 16 years in a brief moment of not-my-problem-anymoreness. Why the fairies so blatantly ignore these unlikeable traits is beyond me. Anyways, they celebrate by burning a load of spindle wheels while stupidly overlooking the fact that both Maleficent and the three Fairies can summon things into existence at the wave of their wands. A kingdom of fools run by fools I tells ya!

"They should totally let this guy run the kingdom"

So for 16 years the fairies decide that the best way to protect Aurora from nothing is by dumping her in the middle of the forest and not using any magic at all. All of this is completely unnecessary because the curse doesn't actually have any effect until the moment she turns 16, and even then she'll still have to touch a spindle wheel for it to actually work. All they would have to do is make sure she doesn't go a little overboard on her super sweet princess 16th.

So yeah, whatever about being raised in the wild and being brought back to the castle once she was 16 . Just a bit of babysitting seemed to be the best remedy to the curse. However, in a wonderfully retarded tragic turn in events, they leave Aurora alone for no more than 5 mins before she goes ahead and curses the shit out of herself. Maleficent laughs, the fairies cry and decide that no one should figure out about their monumental failure that they had 16 years to prepare for.

So the fairies unintentionally take a page from Maleficent's book and put everyone into a deep slumber until Aurora is to be awoken again. Clearly these fairies never took a biology class. They did this under the belief that this period of slumber may be ever lasting. Ever lasting also means a whole lot of not eating for an entire kingdom.

"Well, at least they'd all be able to wear skinny jeans"

Luckily the kingdoms one hope, Prince Philip, happened to be gallivanting off in the forest with his unnaturally intelligent horse. He just happens to be in love with Aurora, for reasons beyond me as they only met once in the forest and even before that he only saw her as a 1 year old child in a crib when he was something along the age of 6 or 7. This also leads me to believe he's a pedophile. Anyways, Maleficent's steals him and locks her in her totally awesome castle of doom that would give Sauron a run for his money as evil overlord. Insert fairies here and large rescue scene to escape.

Now. Maleficent has clearly shown she is both powerful and quite evil. I do not know what her intentions really are, but usually people living in this mindset demand obedience and loyalty at inhumane expectations. In a heartfelt rage of the entire situation she turns her entire kingdom into a thorny inconvenient garden to hinder our young pedo-prince in his race to Aurora's aid. I guess you could say, she went a little.. Hay-BRIAR! And then she turns into a dragon and fights the prince with "All the powers of Hell!" as quoted. I don't know about you, but if I could turn into a friggin' DRAGON I'd be doing a lot more than sitting around and waiting for a curse to happen in 16 years.

Anyways, as it turns out, the powers of Hell are no match against Prince Philip's Olympic javelin skills. Sword, meet heart. Maleficent has an allergic reaction to this and disappears entirely, leaving behind her clothes. Then our horny prince proceeds to the top of the castle to take advantage of the sleeping 16 year old and ate the face off her.

"oh baby... the things I'm gonna do to you"

Maybe I was looking into the movie a bit much, but I leave you with a recommendation that this movie will most likely not help you sleep. Good night!

Never Say Never

Well folks, while I personally have nothing against the 16 year old lesbian that is Justin Bieber, I know most of the world have chronic hate and death syndrome for him. I can describe this only as a wet dream for Bater's (Bieber Haters) and I have to admit I had my evening made by this short clip.

CSI may be mind numbing toilet gravy, but man, when they want to kill a 16 year old pop idol, the really know how to do it right! We'll just say, it's very bullet-y.

People have always imagined this moment and of course we naturally assume it will never happen. But as our friend Justin would say, Never Say Never...

Blogs, Video Games & Flash Animation - The Worst Would-be Film Title

      As of late, this blog has been seeing the back of my hand a lot. Now, it's not because I hate blogging, I really love doing it in fact. But it's mainly become a syringe in my arm. A syringe full of Aids. This is because I am having a difficult time thinking up wonderful new ideas to compose (like my in previous posts.........) and it's become more and more aggravating, like Christian Bale would feel if he were caught in the middle of a light show or something. I wish I was more productive like the good ole days of my blog, 3 months ago, where every week I would post several new posts of meaningless rants and inspiring mush that would non-erotically satisfy me. Sadly though I have reached a point where I talk about either the same things or try to talk about something sensible and end up looking inbred. Although to many I might seem that way already:

"Duuuh, hi I'm Seán!"

     I'll admit that I have a serious lack of knowledge when it comes to worldly events such as politics or general news. It's my fault entirely of course, but if I were to tackle THAT sort of topic I would probably come out in the end resembling something of a cross between a frog and an ostich (A Frostrich! har har har!). If you can't picture than in your head, I'll tell you now, it looks really REALLY stupid (although imagine how funny it would look if it walked). On top of general knowledge, I have a very limited taste in music and a non-existent interest in sports. In fact if I really think about all I have just said, I have serious ice-breakers issues when it comes down to first conversations. I'm surprised I have friends! Well apart from ye of course, my readers and followers (which is down from 16 to 15 in the last week or two, talk about ENCOURAGING!). At least I can still check up on the number of views my old posts racked up, back when I'd get excited at the thought of someone clicking and even looking at my blog for more than two seconds, to which I'd think "OH MAH GOSH, they READEZ mah BLOGGGgggggggg!"

"Bluuaaaaaaa Read MAH BLOG, BLuauauauauaaasohappy!!!"

     Luckily for me though I've been slightly above average productive on several fronts. 3 out of 4 of these things actually count. I've cut down on drinking, am saving moneys and I am regaining my patience for being productive yaaaaaaay! What does this mean for you? Well nothing, but you should be happy for me, as my followers. Before I go on to talking about what regaining patience has helped me achieve, FIRST I shall talk about number 4 of my productive front, the one that doesn't count, but has proven to be awesome to me over the last few weeks.

      Number 4 is a little Wii game called Donkey Kong Country Returns. I cannot state how much barrels of awesomeness this game throws at you, no pun intended, har dee har har! While many people might scoff at the mention of a game on Nintendo's comparatively retarded hardware compared to it's HD cousins, I can tell you one thing. Cram it up yo' ass! Donkey Kong takes most PS3 & Xbox 360 games and wipes it's arse thoroughly with them. It carries the franchises' old school gaming lovingly into the modern era, like a bum holds his liquor. On top of that it sucks you in, chews you up and shits you out because it is so damn tough. Just getting through the game in general is probably enough to test David Blaine's patience and then once that's done there's tons of secrets and unlockables all hidden away in this innocent beastly package. And, no thanks to Retro Studios (the makers), the amazing art direction hides the Wii's underpowered hardware to produce some truely stunning vista's and animation that sits up there with the top of any of this generations console games, take a look:

    Now, I'm finished speaking of productive front number 4. Speaking of animation however, this is where my patience has become a virtue as of recently. Where as over the last few years my patience for working on most projects has eroded away like Michael Jackson's face (both living and dead I guess), I have recently begun rebuilding it as I took my first step into the world of Flash Animation. A year ago Adobe Flash settled quite nicely onto my laptop but became the neglected eldest child in my family of programs because I had little patience to work on it. However, I recently came across videos on character animation in Flash on a great but expensive website to download from. Luckily for me I "found" most of the videos else where online at the base price you would pay for, I dunno, saaaaay, nothing. They're great tutorials (which I have yet to finish) but even with what I've learnt from them I've found that having the patience to go through with animation has been rewarding. For example, I have made this already just to flex my memory of the tutorials:

    In retrospect it's quite shite, very spasticated, short and simple. That sounds like I'm describing myself actually. Anyways I have proven to myself that I can use the tools of the program to make the creature above and the same workflow I had on that can be applied to an entire animation, which is what I plan to do next. I took a step and now I'm taking a leap, let's hope I don't fall, like I did the in stockroom at work the other day. My next big project involves a comic I made of my friend Paddy and his irrational fear of people touching his hair.

So I'm going to animate Paddy going from this (he's the really happy one):

To this:

It will be fun and it is also very true to life if you were to try or be caught in this situation.

As for the first 2 productive fronts, I have already mentioned them. Number 1 is saving money and number 2 is drinking less, which is actually an offshoot of saving money. I want to save up for a new DSLR camera, as I have been planning for ages, so I can make better quality short films and I also want to buy a scanner/printer so I can do some frame by frame animation on the side too!

That's all for today mah friiiieeeeeenndss!

P.S. I actually wrote most of this earlier but accidentally DELETED ALL OF IT. And learned that Blogger doesn't save previous drafts as a result. Patience.....dwindling...... gaaaaahhhh.....

Completely Off Topic

As with so many things I make attempts at in my life, this blog as of lately has fallen into my pit of neglect, along eating healthily, my new years resolutions and my promise to myself never to watch another episode of friends on E4. But there is many reasons for this. Well, when I say many I mean two. One, I just can't squeeze a coherent debatable thought out of my brain and the second, I am quite lazy. Basically, I've turned into M. Night Shyamalan, the gigantic prick-wad known for every disaster of a film he's made outside of The Sixth Sense. I still think he's yet to reveal his true form; a giant smelly slimy Arse that craps film onto a reel every 9 months after it has gotten its sustenance from ill received ratings from critics who treat films as if they're doctored psychologists at a hypochondriac convention.

"Cinema has yet again positioned itself under my ASS! Nya nya nya nya nyaaaaa!"

If the title of this post hasn't become clear, it's just a way of me stating that this post is going to be a tumbling cascade of thoughts spilling out of my mind in attempt to unblock the block. In an analogy, my thoughts are the plunger, my brain is the toilet and the blockage is a giant pooh someone couldn't flush properly because they used loads of toilet paper to cover it up. There possibly won't be any coherent topic just a load of random things that I will attempt to somehow connect "cleverly" together in many ways by the end of this post6 (remember, "many" really means two).


However as I continue typing I'm hoping that metaphorical pooh will move millimetre by millimetre until the cleansing water of ideas come flowing into my mind again. What's that? I already feel the pooh slide minutely! A small topic has just dawned on me that I can speak of. It is Facebook related. Actually, this is something that happened just today, well, was meant to happen. I created an event in which you were supposed to change your Facebook profile picture into the worst picture you could find of yourself on Facebook. I believe I cleverly called it something along the lines of "Find your worst picture and Make it your Profile Picture... Day" which is literally what it was called. And not very clever either. 


Anyways I had it made a few days prior to it's due date and invited all my friends to join in on it. I wasn't surprised to see it spread as everyone always invites others randomly to join, nor was I surprised to see that about 1 in every 50 people actually bothered to give a response. However I WAS surprised to see people had actually decided they were not partaking in this event because, you know, Facebook profiles have always been a thing of pride. Did you also know Obama is white and He Man is straight? Vanity is the new thing this year I guess!

"Don't worry, we've proven, like these two, that we are probably too photogenic to defile our profiles..."

Stranger still was people that "might" be attending, or partaking in it. You might attend changing your profile picture for a day? Come on, are you contemplating on the thought that the copious amounts of people on Facebook that are complete strangers might be judging you? Because you're certainly not surprising your friends! They all have seen the your moments when they fleetingly think "what creature was sacrificed to bring him/her into this world?", so I don't think anyone should pretend they have an ounce of dignity left to spare for their Facebook profile page above all things! 


This leads me onto the next paragraph of this slowly extending but increasingly closing story. I certainly don't have an ounce of dignity to spare for my profile page, let alone have any left in general at this point in my life anyways, ESPECIALLY not after today. Since of course I created the event I obviously was willingly (and excitedly) going to partake in it. And partake I did in which amongst the many hideous photos of me, one sang through like a slipknot church choir:

"Hello people of the Universe"

Yes that is me. I think I'd give H.R. Gieger a run for his money in the new Alien movie if I sold this as concept art. On top of this, very few people actually changed their profile picture to a horrible portrait of themselves. And ON TOP OF THAT, I set the date for this event to the 01//02/2011, today, the date of my birthday. I essentially turned my profile page on Facebook into a magnet of terror for an entire day as people came onto my page to say "Happy Birthday" only to be greeted with a giant metamorphic human sperm THING.

It was a public display of my stupidity and for a moment I almost wished I had dignity to spare. But in the end all I could do was laugh at myself. And prepare to be much lonelier in my life. Maybe I could start hanging out with M. Night Shyamalan (I always think of Watermelons when I say his name? Shy Watermelons...). He doesn't seem to have any dignity left for himself, and he certainly doesn't make pretty pictures any more. In many ways the previous sentence marked the end of this Blog post!

P.S. When you say P.S. as a word it sounds like someone pissing. I also think the pooh is flushing.

The Prospect of a New Year

Happy New Years (and Jesus Day!) to all, during the last week or two I have been struggling to become a normal human being again after copious amounts of partying and eating so much that I could spend a year in the toilet. That was a lie, I've actually only been out a few times over both Xmas and for New Years. Anyways with the New Years comes all these lofty expectations we make for ourselves. I actually haven't made any resolutions as my quitting smoking would have been it, maybe I should just take it up and use it for next years one? Only the day before though.... or maybe the year before. In a sort of ironic way I think that fitness is a lazy one to come up with (that sentence destroyed a galaxy before), and I figure that once I drop the pooh bomb while listening to the inception soundtrack I will deflate to normal size again.

"Ellen Page eats a lot during Xmas too"

I always find it super duper hard to come up with a resolution though being the PERFECT human sample I am and potential UFO abductee candidate. That was also a lie, I'm an Alien. Maybe I should stop lying as a resolution? The best way really to come up with a new years resolution I figure is to look back on what I've learnt throughout the year. Unfortunately none of these things I've learnt have been in anyway beneficial to my life but all I can do is list them off in hope of finding SOME resolution, I'll give it a Yay or Nay if it's something that needs rectifying:

1. No matter how hard you try, strutting while listening to music is inevitable. (Nay, I look stupid consistently)

2. You are not winning money at the ATM. (Yay, I am only spending)

3. Shots always win. (Yay, stop drinking shots)

4. You become inherently productive when drunk. (Yay, this has proved hazardous for me on multiple occassions, just go to bed people)

5. Impulse buying when hungover does not a better day make. (Yay, this usually starts a tea and toast diet)

6. I think I see some sort of pattern here:

YAY, now I see a particularly beneficial resolution. If you didn't notice, this list actually (and naturally) assembled itself into the spending pattern of a night out. There is only one solution to this: Buy cheaper drink!

"YAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy!!!"

I jest, I actually do want to drink less, it's a reasonable resolution and I do become much more productive when I'm not hungover every 2nd or 3rd day. Such as this crappy blog, or writing or blada yada yada. Maybe I can start working on practical jokes, like running into the middle of a Veteran's Day Memorial and screaming the time from a 24 hour clock. In the opposite of retrospect though, that might kill off the remaining veteran's inadvertently, so I guess my idea of practical jokes might prove hilariously fatal. I can see the headlines already "In a Series of comical events, 100 people die".

My real focus this year is to save money and get myself some not needed but beneficial items, like a new laptop and a camera. And NOT a HP laptop. I think HP really means Huge Penis as in, they're a corporation of gigantic dicks raping the consumer. I'd also like to get myself a fancy DSLR camera so I can begin to shoot my own little shorts so I can finally begin to put mah degree in Film and TV to some use. For those of you around, any hand in this would be muchos appreciated although it comes with a word of warning, it may reduce your social status a wee biteen if this is any example:

Pooor Katie...... Anyways along with the buying of things, Canada seems like a viable selection of career advancing so I hope to pay visit there and maybe you'll be in the cinema in a few years to see The Fiancee: Stand Still While I Shoot. Alas as with any plans, resolutions or ideas, they're all in our little monkey heads and it's one thing to say them than to enact them. If we were just more Jack Bauer then we would always get the results.

Anyways that's my brain spent for the day. What ya'll up to for this year; resolutions, plans and etc.? Throw em at me if you feel like dropping a comment!